Would you trade love for a life of leisure with the wrong man? A recent poll said women were “very” or “extremely” willing to marry for money.
Money, or lack of money can be tied to our self-esteem. Insecure women brag about their designer clothes and fancy vacations. They even manage to drop information about their stock accounts and investments into the conversation– which in this economy may or may not be the truth. A friend and her husband invested in a financial pyramid scheme. We heard about their remarkable returns often. When the scheme collapsed it smashed her fragile self-esteem.
Money can be a weapon or way to hold power over a partner. One of my formerly married friends slipped into a money power struggle. They both had successful careers and no desire to have children. He collected watches. When he bought an expensive watch, she bought something equally expensive. Another formerly married stay-at-home mom ran up the credit cards. When her husband traveled, she felt lonely and bought herself expensive clothes and jewelry– often never wearing it around her husband. As the bills piled up, guilt piled onto her loneliness. Paying only the minimum on those credit cards soon dragged them into financial debt. Their marriage collapsed.
Money is more than credit cards, new cars, and holidays in far off destinations. It is wedged deep down in our emotional lives. We need to separate our money and emotions. Money should not be used to control a relationship or boost a sagging self-esteem.
Are you looking for a wealthy Prince Charming? If so, dig a little deeper, be honest with yourself and ask, “Why?
Molly Brown, DMS
"Birth Control for Non Contraceptive Purposes" is on my other blog, Lyn's Circle